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White House To Seek Ban On Gay Sex On The Moon
February 28, 2004 — 8:30 pm

According to The Poor Man:

WASHINGTON (Reuters) – Worried by flagging poll numbers, a deteriorating situation in Iraq, and a sluggish economy, President Bush called on Congress today to approve a constitutional amendment that would ban gay sex on the Moon. Republican leaders hailed the move as a bold step to unite the country in a bold and forward-looking strategy to spread family values across the solar system, and protect the legacy of the Apollo missions.

“This is an excellent idea, simply excellent,” said house Majority Leader Tom DeLay. “I remember the Apollo missions, and the incredible spirit of national pride and the interest in science and our amazing universe that it created. All the kids in the neighborhood wanted to be astronauts. It was like a Tom Hanks movie. And, looking for the first time at a man in an air-tight bunny suit walking around the antiseptic, cratered, lifeless surface of that blasted orb, I knew I wanted to grow up to be an exterminator. But all these beautiful dreams would be destroyed forever if some gay people got up there and had sex. I think we’d just have to blow up the Moon or something.”

BWAHAHAHAHAHAHA

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— Justin M. StoddardComments (0)

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