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Justin M. Stoddard


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Shave and a Haircut
September 15, 2003 — 5:00 am

Courtesy of Reason.com’s Hit and Run

Heroic “reporter” breaks up underground liquor ring, with extreme risk to his life and safety. Read the astounding story here!

On Thursday, Aug. 28, this reporter, responding to a tip that Whiskers was serving alcohol without a license, visited the salon and made an appointment, giving a false occupation when asked about his job, and was served two cups of beer.

With a wide-screen television, indoor putting green, plush leather couches, assortment of men’s magazines and attractive stylists, Whiskers aims to be a destination for the same male clientele that favors Maxim Magazine, co-owner Richard Petipas told the Danvers Herald in a February interview.

Petipas said he hoped to do for haircuts what Hooters did for chicken wings.

During that first interview, Petipas was asked if he would seek a liquor license, in order to serve beer, as do similar establishments that were researched by this reporter via the Internet. Petipas responded that he would not, as a liquor license would be too expensive.

Of course, the establishment was soon visited by police where a daring undercover sting operation ensued.

Local news is just so much crap these days. How do this apes get away with calling this “investigative reporting”? Man, thank G-d for the fourth estate! These brave men and women are out there every day exposing corruption, reporting wrongs, keeping our elected officials honest.

Oh, my mistake. That would be too hard. Instead they are content with shaking down local businesses all the while pretending they are providing a public service.

I’m really worked up over this one. The “reporter” and the news organization that signed off on this “story” deserve our collective scorn at the very least. If I were a business owner, I would refuse to conduct any transaction with this joker. Perhaps when he can’t buy a meal to eat, or clothes to wear he would learn to play nicely with others.

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